The Consequence Hurts More than The Coercive Control

Imagine... you barely see your friends or family anymore because you get so much grief when you do, that it spoils the day.

Or, you feel disconnected from your friends because not only do you barely see them, but you hardly message them either as that even causes an argument.

If you do get invited to meet someone, they can’t stand your boyfriend and want you to go alone ...which is near impossible.

You finally go out for the first time in months and get to see your friend. It’s an amazing day of catching up, having lunch together and lots of laughing. It feels exciting and comforting to be able to spend time with someone else, rather than the usual 24/7 with your boyfriend.

When you arrive home you want to talk about the day and relive the enjoyment by describing it to him but as soon as you see his stony glare you know better.

He’s grumpy and unfriendly. You wish you’d stayed out. When you ask what’s up it causes an argument. He verbally attacks you because “you’ve been out having fun” while he’s been “sat waiting”. Although, you know that’s a lie. He’s been at work all day and only been home for a little while.

You’d have loved to have stayed out longer but you already made an excuse and went home, knowing it’d already cause a problem.

You wish you’d stayed out having fun. Now, your day feels spoilt as he sits in silence. He’s gone from gas lighting you, to blanking you.

As the day turns toxic, you sit, questioning if it’s worth you meeting friends at all, if this is what you have to come home to...

No relationship should be toxic.